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The Occasionally Accurate Annals of Football

The Occasionally Accurate Annals of Football

  • Downloads：2581
  • Type：Epub+TxT+PDF+Mobi
  • Create Date：2023-11-03 06:21:04
  • Update Date：2025-09-08
  • Status：finish
  • Author：Dan Patrick
  • ISBN：B0C5P8HCVY
  • Environment：PC/Android/iPhone/iPad/Kindle
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Summary

Celebrated sports commentator Dan Patrick and comedy writer Joel H。 Cohen team up with some of America’s greatest* comedy writers to tell you everything and nothing about America’s sport！**

*“greatest” is actually just a bad type-o for “mediocre”
**No， not darts， we mean pro football。 （book on professional darts coming never）

Did you know 。 。 。

Tom Brady is a very good quarterback。 （True， but only according to statistics and accomplishments。）

The formation of the NFL took place in an auto dealership。 The founders started an institution and also were convinced to buy rust-proofing for it。 （Half true。）

The Carolina Panthers originated as a book club but turned to football when they couldn’t agree on which John Grisham novel to read。 （Maybe true。 Research isn’t our thing。）

The Occasionally Accurate Annals of Football is a love letter to America’s favorite game， full of highlights， history， great plays and players， scandals， Super Bowls， and a series of lies， idiotic theories， baseless conspiracies， a diet that may kill you and， of course， a poorly-written haiku。 The book takes the credibility Dan Patrick has built up over a stellar broadcast career （ESPN， NBC Sports， something called “Peacock”） and risks it all with these falsehoods， half-truths， and even some quarter-truths。

This parade of inanity is co-written by Joel H。 Cohen （3 Emmys， several cavities due to poor flossing） and includes contributions from certifiably hilarious people， such as:

• Andy Richter （ Late Night with Conan O’Brien ）
• Brian Kelley （ The Simpsons， Saturday Night Live ）
• Chuck Tatham （ Modern Family， Arrested Development， How I Met Your Mother ）
• Mike Price （ The Simpsons， F is for Family ）
• Donick Cary （ Silicon Valley， New Girl ）
• Christine Nangle （ Inside Amy Schumer， Saturday Night Live ）
• Broti Gupta （ The New Yorker， The New York Times， The Simpsons ）
• Rob Cohen （ Saturday Night Live， Big Bang Theory ）

Illustrated in two colors （black and white are colors， right？） The Occasionally Accurate Annals of Football informs （a little）， entertains （a lot）， and is the perfect gift to taunt the Jets fans in your life。

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Reviews

Jennifer B ，

The Occasionally Accurate Annals of FootballBy: Dan Patrick， Joel H。 CohenNarrated By: Dan PatrickReview Score: 4 StarsBoogie’s Bulletpoints•This is a fun book that doesn’t take itself too seriously。 •No spoilers， but there are a few quips about Gronk and JJ Watt that made me laugh out loud！•While a lighthearted book， there is a little bit about the history of football built in。 •If you are football fan， you will enjoy this。 ———The Occasionally Accurate Annals of Football was kindly provided as The Occasionally Accurate Annals of FootballBy: Dan Patrick， Joel H。 CohenNarrated By: Dan PatrickReview Score: 4 StarsBoogie’s Bulletpoints•This is a fun book that doesn’t take itself too seriously。 •No spoilers， but there are a few quips about Gronk and JJ Watt that made me laugh out loud！•While a lighthearted book， there is a little bit about the history of football built in。 •If you are football fan， you will enjoy this。 ———The Occasionally Accurate Annals of Football was kindly provided as an ARC by Netgalley and RB Media。 Thank you for allowing me to read this wonderful book！ Release Date: Out Now！The only other sport I love more than F1 is football。 I was excited to see this book pop up on Netgalley， and I really enjoyed it。 It’s truly a mix of factual data and silliness。 It’s definitely worth checking out！Do you watch football？ Do you have a favorite team？ #bookstagram #books #readingnow #boogiereadsbooks #fivekeyfeels #audiobooks #audiobook #arcreview #nonfiction #netgalley #boogiesbulletpoints #theoccasionallyaccurateannalsoffootball #danpatrick #joelhcohen #football 。。。more

Lisa Konet ，

An excellent history about the NFL and professional football。 The best rivalries。 The scandals。 The evolution of some of the most beloved teams。 The different dynasties， thank heavens the Patriots and Tom Brady ones are over （and told with humor。 There ais some trash talk/jokes about Gronk）。 And everything else。Dan Patrick was the perfect writer for an NFL history fandom book because of his love for the sport。 Well written， detailed and insightful。 My only critism/annoyance was having to read th An excellent history about the NFL and professional football。 The best rivalries。 The scandals。 The evolution of some of the most beloved teams。 The different dynasties， thank heavens the Patriots and Tom Brady ones are over （and told with humor。 There ais some trash talk/jokes about Gronk）。 And everything else。Dan Patrick was the perfect writer for an NFL history fandom book because of his love for the sport。 Well written， detailed and insightful。 My only critism/annoyance was having to read this on Netgalley shelf app。 But I highly recommend this for anyone who loves the NFL and has a favorite team。Thanks to Netgalley， Dan Patrick and RB Media for an ARC in exchange for an honest review。Already available 。。。more

Matt Jamieson ，

A forgettable book。 Listen， I love Dan Patrick。 Been listening to his radio show for 13 years， so hearing he had a book coming， I naturally flocked to it。 Perhaps due to the satirical nature of the book， I couldn't get behind Dan as a narrator， as I really felt like the style didn't suit him。 Joel's comedy was ok。。。 and perhaps another narrator， without the gravity of Dan's persona， would have made it easier to listen to。 Overall a fun， yet highly satirical book。。。 it's a forgettable listen， as A forgettable book。 Listen， I love Dan Patrick。 Been listening to his radio show for 13 years， so hearing he had a book coming， I naturally flocked to it。 Perhaps due to the satirical nature of the book， I couldn't get behind Dan as a narrator， as I really felt like the style didn't suit him。 Joel's comedy was ok。。。 and perhaps another narrator， without the gravity of Dan's persona， would have made it easier to listen to。 Overall a fun， yet highly satirical book。。。 it's a forgettable listen， as there's nothing I'm taking away from this book long term。 。。。more

Kristina ，

Dan Patrick does a great job with this love letter to the game of football。 I particularly enjoyed the history here -- I learned that footballs were never made of pigskin， but they are made in Ohio （appropriately。） I laughed quite a lot while reading this， and learned a bunch about how the NFL became the league of today。 It's also a problematic， dangerous mess， which Dan addresses。 No one is shying away from the fact that the average NFL career is 2。5 years -- and so even if you get your dream j Dan Patrick does a great job with this love letter to the game of football。 I particularly enjoyed the history here -- I learned that footballs were never made of pigskin， but they are made in Ohio （appropriately。） I laughed quite a lot while reading this， and learned a bunch about how the NFL became the league of today。 It's also a problematic， dangerous mess， which Dan addresses。 No one is shying away from the fact that the average NFL career is 2。5 years -- and so even if you get your dream job， you very well could be unemployed by the age of 23。 My criticism is that this book really glazes over every subject -- the audio is just under five hours， and so there is very little detail and your favorite players， moments， fan sections， halftime performances only get the quickest mention。 And some of the jokes are a bit corny， but Dan knows that。。。。 he knows。Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC。 。。。more

Dave Pedlar ，

SO funny！ I've read a lot of books about football and they are usually kind of dry - this is a fun， fast and FUNNY book unlike all of those。 I actually learned a lot about the history of the league but it wa enjoyable in every part。 Love the stuff about the rules and my Packers！ SO funny！ I've read a lot of books about football and they are usually kind of dry - this is a fun， fast and FUNNY book unlike all of those。 I actually learned a lot about the history of the league but it wa enjoyable in every part。 Love the stuff about the rules and my Packers！ 。。。more

Matthew Raber ，

Perfect gift for any young sports fan。 Funny， great insights into different eras of football， and some great stories that every sports fan would appreciate。 10/10 would recommend

Bradley Franks ，

The Occasionally Accurate Annals of FootballWritten by Dan Patrick and Joel H。 CohenRead by Dan PatrickBook 197/200Genre: Sports， HistoryFormat: Audio/DigitalPages/Time: 240/4hrs 41minPublished: 2023Rating: 8。5/10"So What Does All of This Really Mean？ 。。。 Wayne Gretzky is the greatest NFL player ever。"This is a book any fan of American Football will enjoy。 Patrick and Cohen take readers through a hilarious history of American football。 It was fun to read through this book and see the teams and h The Occasionally Accurate Annals of FootballWritten by Dan Patrick and Joel H。 CohenRead by Dan PatrickBook 197/200Genre: Sports， HistoryFormat: Audio/DigitalPages/Time: 240/4hrs 41minPublished: 2023Rating: 8。5/10"So What Does All of This Really Mean？ 。。。 Wayne Gretzky is the greatest NFL player ever。"This is a book any fan of American Football will enjoy。 Patrick and Cohen take readers through a hilarious history of American football。 It was fun to read through this book and see the teams and history of the NFL。 From the highs of the Immaculate reception to the lows of the Butt-Fumble， TOAAOF captures it all。 Readers will learn about how a goal in the Premier League is worth ten points in football， and how Tom Brady is the WOAT （Worst of All Time）。 How the Patriots are no-good cheaters and better name options for Washington other than the "Commanders"。 Maybe just don't get this for the Jets fan in your life， why be harder on them than life already is。 。。。more

Nick Katenkamp ，

This book is just as much comedy as it is football， which adds to it being a quick and fun read。 There are some interesting facts about football I learned， though some of the anecdotes don't add much enjoyment to the read。 This book is just as much comedy as it is football， which adds to it being a quick and fun read。 There are some interesting facts about football I learned， though some of the anecdotes don't add much enjoyment to the read。 。。。more

J Earl ，

The Occasionally Accurate Annals of Football， by Dan Patrick and Joel H Cohen， is a fun semi-factual look at football。 I listened to the audiobook， narrated by Patrick。My rating is an average of what I would give the audiobook alone and what I would give the paper version alone。 Patrick does a fine job narrating， but the book is composed of little snippets with illustrations around them。 These are grouped into chapters。 In addition to not having the mostly fun illustrations， we lose some of the The Occasionally Accurate Annals of Football， by Dan Patrick and Joel H Cohen， is a fun semi-factual look at football。 I listened to the audiobook， narrated by Patrick。My rating is an average of what I would give the audiobook alone and what I would give the paper version alone。 Patrick does a fine job narrating， but the book is composed of little snippets with illustrations around them。 These are grouped into chapters。 In addition to not having the mostly fun illustrations， we lose some of the feel of these being a lot of short anecdotes （usually with a germ of truth that gets embellished， shall we say）。 The physical book would be one you might want to dip into periodically for fun。 The audiobook is set up， and read， as chapters。 That is just a bit more than I wanted to handle。 It isn't that Patrick doesn't usually try to pause between pieces， but when listening it all gets to be a long stream of fun but absurd jokes。I did find myself looking up a lot of stuff to see where exactly the facts end and the fiction begins， which was fun。 I've followed and read about football since I was a child and there was a lot I learned here。 My recommendation is split。 I recommend the audiobook with the warning to take breaks far more often than every chapter， which becomes a bit cumbersome。 The physical or ebook， however， I recommend highly， the format keeps you from reading straight through and adds some whimsy。Reviewed from a copy made available by the publisher via NetGalley。 。。。more

Craig Cunningham ，

Kind of fun and interesting， kind of corny。 Better than "Hubie Halloween。" DP is still a legend though。 Kind of fun and interesting， kind of corny。 Better than "Hubie Halloween。" DP is still a legend though。 。。。more

Janine ，

I’ve been a fan of Dan Patrick for a very long time from his years of sportscasting and hosting The Dan Patrick Show on various platforms。 So listening to The Occasionally Accurate Annals of Football， all about the history and basics of pro gridiron football， was a no brainer。 In the span of less than 5 hours， Dan Patrick （written with the help of Joel H。 Cohen）， goes through the history of pro football， each chapter covering a new decade。 This mostly covers the NFL， but does mention rival leagu I’ve been a fan of Dan Patrick for a very long time from his years of sportscasting and hosting The Dan Patrick Show on various platforms。 So listening to The Occasionally Accurate Annals of Football， all about the history and basics of pro gridiron football， was a no brainer。 In the span of less than 5 hours， Dan Patrick （written with the help of Joel H。 Cohen）， goes through the history of pro football， each chapter covering a new decade。 This mostly covers the NFL， but does mention rival leagues in a chapter， basics about each team and other parts of the game， such as media coverage and rules。 All of it is laced with comedy that had me busted out laughing throughout the entire book， all with the classic Dan Patrick humor。 There are also some sections written by some pro comedians， that add an extra flavor to the book。 The comedy and humor is kept PG， some mild swears， but appropriate for most audiences。 If you're looking for a in depth reference and history of the NFL or gridiron football in general， this isn't the book， but that's not a bad thing。 This is a book that covers the basics and does it well， perfect for those just getting into the sport， but also great for life long fans looking for a fun way to further consume the sport。*I received an ARC of the audiobook from Netgalley and Recorded Books。 All opinions are my own。* 。。。more

Greg Holman ，

This was a fun quick read。 As a big football fan most of the time you knew the parts which were made up， but sometimes you never knew if it was real or not。

Justin Cox ，

Received as a ARC from NetGalley。If you know and like football you’ll likely like this book。 If you don’t， you won’t。 A heavy smattering of wit and sarcasm。

Jennifer ，

This was a fun， easy read。 If you’re a fan of football， you’ll enjoy this。

Jed Walker ，

NFL history with a snarky， witty tone。

Joel Cohen ，

Hilarious - it's full of info but always in a lighthearted way。 You'll read about the history of the league， every team， the butt fumble （so much butt fumble）， the media and so much more。 There's a ton of boring， dry books about football， but this has a ton of info and insight but all wrapped in a delicate coating of fun （pigskin in a blanket？）。 Also ADAM SANDLER？ Andy Richter？ Writers from "The Simpsons" and "Saturday Night Live"？ Will I run out of question marks？ Apparently not。 Hilarious - it's full of info but always in a lighthearted way。 You'll read about the history of the league， every team， the butt fumble （so much butt fumble）， the media and so much more。 There's a ton of boring， dry books about football， but this has a ton of info and insight but all wrapped in a delicate coating of fun （pigskin in a blanket？）。 Also ADAM SANDLER？ Andy Richter？ Writers from "The Simpsons" and "Saturday Night Live"？ Will I run out of question marks？ Apparently not。 。。。more

Matthew Edwards ，

The book was enjoyable。 It was a little hard because everything was a joke so it was hard to tell what was fun intel to players， teams， and games or what was just a joke。

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Reference

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